Let me tell you something a little personal: my wife and I use sex toys. Regularly. We’re not ashamed of it—in fact, it’s something that’s brought us closer together, added a spark to our relationship, and allowed us to discover new ways to enjoy each other’s company. And here’s the thing: it shouldn’t be taboo.

I grew up in France, where the attitude toward sex is generally a little more open-minded. We talk about it. We accept it as part of life. We understand that pleasure, intimacy, and exploration are important parts of a healthy relationship. So for me, incorporating sex toys into my love life has never felt weird or shameful. Quite the opposite. It’s felt natural, exciting, and honestly, a lot of fun.

Now, as someone who reviews sex toys sometimes, I get questions from couples who are curious but unsure where to start. Some think it’s only for the adventurous or the bored. Others are worried it might create distance instead of closeness. But the truth is, sex toys for couples are one of the best ways to reconnect, communicate, and reignite desire.

So whether you’re just starting to explore or you’ve been together for decades and want to try something new, here are five solid, pleasure-filled reasons to give sex toys a go as a couple.

1. They Break Routine

Let’s be honest—even the most passionate relationships can fall into a rhythm. Work, kids, stress, exhaustion... it’s easy to let routine take over the bedroom. Sex becomes scheduled (if it happens at all) and before you know it, it’s the same positions, same moves, same outcomes.

Sex toys shake that up. Bringing a toy into the bedroom is like introducing a wildcard. Suddenly, there’s something new to explore, to laugh about, to get curious with. Whether it’s a couples' vibrator, a suction toy, or even something simple like a vibrating cock ring, it changes the pace. You’re not just doing the usual routine—you’re playing.

That shift in mindset from performance to play is powerful. It takes the pressure off and puts the focus back on pleasure and discovery. You might not even realise how stuck in autopilot you were until you try something new and think, "Why didn’t we do this sooner?"

Sex toys for couples come in so many varieties that it’s almost impossible not to find one that fits your vibe (pun intended). Use a remote control vibrator during a romantic dinner or try a massage wand during foreplay. The options are endless, and every new experience adds a little fire to your connection.

2. They Help You Communicate Better

Here’s something you don’t often hear: using sex toys can improve your communication. Not just in bed, but in your relationship overall. Why? Because they open the door to conversations that matter—about pleasure, comfort, boundaries, and desires.

When you introduce a toy, you have to talk. "Do you want to try this?" "Does this feel good?" "What if we added this next time?" These might seem like simple questions, but they foster a deeper level of honesty and trust. You’re not guessing what your partner wants—you’re asking. And you’re listening.

That kind of communication builds confidence. It creates a safe space where both people can express themselves without judgment. And let’s face it, the more you talk about what turns you on, the more likely you are to actually get turned on. For couples who find it awkward to talk about sex, a toy can act as a bridge. It gives you something to focus on, a starting point. You might begin with a bullet vibrator and end up discussing fantasies you’ve never shared before. That’s the magic of opening up.

And the bonus? This new openness often spills over into everyday life. You start noticing better communication outside the bedroom too. Sex toys might just be the key to unlocking conversations you didn’t even know you needed to have.

3. They Enhance Intimacy, Not Replace It

One of the biggest myths about sex toys is that they replace the human element. That somehow, using a toy means there’s a problem with your partner, or that it creates distance. That couldn’t be further from the truth.

In reality, sex toys for couples enhance intimacy. They add layers. They help you focus more on each other, not less. Think of them like tools—you’re not using them instead of your partner, you’re using them with your partner to deepen the experience. Take something like a wearable vibrator that can be controlled by your partner. There’s something incredibly intimate about handing over that control. It creates a game of trust and anticipation, whether you’re at home or out and about. And when you climax together with a toy involved? It’s still a shared moment, just intensified.

Sex toys can also help address mismatched libidos or pleasure gaps in a gentle, supportive way. If one partner needs more stimulation or has a harder time reaching orgasm, a toy can balance things out, making sex more satisfying for both of you.

Rather than causing detachment, many couples report feeling more connected after introducing toys. It’s a shared adventure, a mutual discovery. And if you're laughing, blushing, or gasping together, that sounds like a pretty intimate experience to me.

4. They’re Great for Exploring

If you've ever thought about trying something new in the bedroom but didn't know how to start, toys are the perfect gateway. They make exploring feel less intimidating and a lot more fun.

For example: anal play. It’s something a lot of couples are curious about but unsure how to approach. Toys can help ease that path. A beginner-friendly anal plug, for instance, is designed to be comfortable, safe, and unintimidating. Add a bit of lube and go slow, and you’ve just opened up a whole new world of sensation. There are also toys for pegging, prostate stimulation, bondage kits for light BDSM play, and toys that are designed for temperature play. You don’t have to go full Fifty Shades, but it can be thrilling to try something that's always been on your "maybe one day" list.

Exploring doesn’t have to mean going wild. It could be as simple as introducing a warming lubricant or trying a toy that mimics oral sex. The important thing is that you’re doing it together, with curiosity and consent.

And trust me, when you find something new that you both love, it adds a whole new layer to your connection. There’s nothing quite like discovering a new favourite together and thinking, "Why didn’t we try this before?"

5. Pleasure Is Healthier Than You Think

We don’t talk enough about how good sex is for your health. I’m not just talking about cardio, either (though hey, it counts!). I’m talking about stress relief, better sleep, boosted mood, and even improved immune function. Sex toys help you tap into all those benefits more regularly. They make it easier to get in the mood, to reach orgasm, to stay connected. That means more oxytocin (the bonding hormone), more dopamine (the feel-good hormone), and less cortisol (the stress hormone).

If you or your partner sometimes struggle with desire or arousal, toys can help bridge that gap. They remove some of the pressure and help make pleasure more accessible, especially during stressful periods, hormonal changes, or even just long days with kids and work.

And let’s not forget how good it feels to be desired. When your partner surprises you with a new toy or suggests trying something together, it sends a clear message: "I want you. I want us to have fun together."

That’s powerful. And in a world where we’re constantly tired, distracted, and overwhelmed, carving out moments of pleasure and play with your partner isn’t just healthy—it’s essential.

Final thoughts

So there you have it: five honest, pleasure-packed reasons to give sex toys a try as a couple. Whether you’re curious, cautious, or already have a drawer full of favourites, remember that the goal isn’t perfection—it’s connection. And if you can giggle, moan, and maybe learn something new together along the way? Even better. Go on. Try something new tonight. If you are in the UK, check Sinful UK Adult Shop.

Jerome

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